Introducing Lulu from The Devil Within

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Okay–just so you know, I will be experimenting with the theme on this blog over the next couple of weeks. Mainly, I need a theme that will allow me to have plug-ins or put a form so you all can sign up for my newsletter. And speaking of newsletters, if you’re interested, you can sign up over at my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/laurengreenewrites) or send me a message through the Contact Form on the “About Page,” with your name and email address.

I went to the beach this weekend, and I didn’t do any prep for this blog. Yesterday, when we got home I was exhausted and didn’t write at all. I’ve been writing a lot lately, and I think it’s because I need to be editing. Writing is the lesser of two evils. (Ha–actually I love writing but editing is akin to cleaning up my room, which everyone knows I hate to do).

I decided to introduce you to Lulu today. Lulu is William’s cousin in The Devil Within. She and William are the same age. They attend the same school, and they’re best friends. Lulu also has alopecia universalis (hair loss over the entire body). When I wrote Lulu, I didn’t intentionally make her bald. I’m not one of these people who has to put myself into a book, but when Lulu was created she had alopecia. She’s a nine year old child who knows what it’s like to be different. She’s protective of William and loves him fiercely. She also knows William is being abused, but can’t fix that problem.

As a nine year old child, I was different from Lulu. I did not feel at home in my skin. I had patchy alopecia, meaning I had random bald spots on my head (now I have alopecia universalis). I was in the 4th grade at a public school in Alabama, and being bullied by a boy who was a lot stronger and bigger than me. He said mean things to me, verbally and physical abused me, and was generally a horrible person to me. I had a lot of hate for that kid, but his hate turned into a lack of confidence in myself. It meant I was afraid to talk about alopecia. It meant I thought little of myself. Basically, the bully got what he wanted: power. I didn’t want anyone to know I had it, and so a few years later when I went to camp for five weeks, I kept my hair in a ponytail for five weeks and didn’t wash it to keep people from finding out I had bald spots. It took me a long time to get over the unkind words of my bully, Rondre. It took me a long time to realize I’m beautiful for who I am, not for what I look like on the outside. It took me a long time to realize that just because someone chooses to hurt you with their words doesn’t mean those words are true. And it took me a long time to accept myself.

But Lulu is not like that. She accepts herself for who she is. She is a strong child who doesn’t let other people tear her down. She brings out the child in William. She lets us see who William could be if his world wasn’t falling apart. She is his advocate and his friend, and she is self-assured and strong, partially because she has to deal with having alopecia herself.

At this point in my life, I’ve forgiven my bully. I don’t know what was going on in his life when he decided to pick on me, but he must have been suffering too. I wish I had the confidence Lulu had in my book when I was growing up. But I didn’t then. Now I do. Accepting and loving yourself is important. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.

What Is Writing?

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This week I was in a funk. Down in the dumps. Not writing. Woe-is-me. Then, I changed my attitude. I started writing again, and I felt a huge wave of relief run through me. I’m a writer. I’m meant to write. When I don’t write I become morose.

I read an article the other day. It was an article from the New Yorker called Is Writing Torture? A young new writer/waiter in a cafe presented his manuscript to the Philip Roth, and Roth apparently told him “I would quit while you’re ahead.” Elizabeth Gilbert author of Eat, Pray, Love was upset by this advice and said writing is a “fucking great” job.

Their different viewpoints on writing don’t surprise me. Look at Roth’s writing. It’s dark. Look at Gilbert’s. Love is magical and wonderful. Life is amazing. Some people think Roth was only kidding. Being the older mentor who threw a curve ball at this kid to see if he would flinch. And some people think Gilbert is not realistic. Writing is not great: it’s hard as fuck!

I think both contradictory views are true. Writing is torture and writing is a “fucking great” job. I need to write. It’s not a want. It’s not a hobby. It’s something deep inside of me. When I don’t write I’m unhappy. Writing’s explicit job in my life is for me to be able to verbally throw up all the shit from inside my brain onto the computer so I feel like I’ve dealt with the crap swirling around in my mind and can move on. Writing is cathartic. Writing is therapy. Writing is a way for me to deal with ideas and thoughts I can’t quite wrap my mind around.

And, no, this does not make writing easy. Nothing about writing is easy. Hey, No Turning Back, my self-published book is currently sitting at a rank of 1,000,000 on Amazon, and I have no idea how to market it to get to more readers. It’s not easy. It’s hard. It’s hard to get your name out there. It’s hard to find readers. It’s hard when you write something and you think it’s amazing, and someone else tells you it sucks. But that’s the job just like any other job and you have to roll with the punches and move on. A writer isn’t someone who is going to quit because it’s hard. A writer doesn’t really have that option, because the need to write always rears its ugly head.

The thing about writing I find most difficult is not the writing part. A writer has to wear many hats: editor, marketer, public speaker, etc. Marketing is somewhat of an enigma to me. The point is to have other people spread the word about your work, but I haven’t gotten there yet. And I think a lot of it is a time management problem. With three kids, a day job, and a busy life I simply don’t have as much time as I want to put into it. If it was up to me I’d put a huge amount of time into finding more ways to market my work. But, I’m confident one day I’ll get to the point where I can devote all my time to this job.

So is writing torture? No. It’s a way of life, and life is full of ups and downs.

Introducing William Hill

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Today was one of those days where I didn’t know what to blog. Lately, I’ve been busy procrastinating. I haven’t felt well since Sunday, and on Monday I was sick and watched seven episodes of Scandal. I mean really folks, why didn’t someone tell me what I was missing? Amazing. I love this show, and now it’s all I want to do, but I have a book coming out. No rest for the weary. (I really wouldn’t have it any other way).

So, I decided to write about William. Who is William? He’s the main character in my book, The Devil Within, which is due to be released on June 22, 2015! William is a nine year old boy who is growing up in Pine Level, Alabama. He’s very much like any typical nine year old: swinging on tire swings, playing in dirt, loves comic books and super heroes, and discovering himself. William has a younger sister, Maybelle, and an older brother Roy. William shares a room with his brother Roy (and boy, do I know what that’s like–Allison!), and is always getting into his big brother’s stuff. One fateful day, before the book begins, William’s mother, sister and brother are ripped away from him in a horrible car accident while William is at home sick. He’s left to be raised by his father, Leroy, who is an alcoholic and a religious zealot who has no idea how to deal with his own grief. Over the course of a year, William grows and changes in the face of daunting circumstance and finds an ally in his grown cousin Tommy.

Interested now? On June 19th, right here, I’ll have a cover reveal on this site. And stay tuned over the next couple of weeks as I introduce the characters from the book, so you can get to know them a little better!

 

Newsletter Is A’Coming!

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I had a busy weekend. I told my boys I would take them to Airwalk, an indoor trampoline arena one of the first weeks of summer. This was the weekend! We went up with a friend. And, there’s no video proof, but I did a front flip! It only took me the whole time to get my nerve up but once I did I wanted to do it over and over again. We had a two hour jump, but we only lasted one and a half hours. Granted, my oldest told me he could have jumped the whole 2 hours, but my seven year old was exhausted. Then we went to the Cheesecake Factory and made a stop at the Lego store before we came home. I want to be a kid again!

Here’s some videos of the kids getting their jump on:

I’ve been goal oriented lately, but with our day trip and then my niece and nephew being here yesterday, I didn’t achieve my goal of getting my newsletter set up this weekend. There never seems to be enough time in the day. Plus, now I’m ill and feel so tired from hacking up a lung. But I’m just going to move that goal over to this week and make sure it gets done.

Tell me more about this newsletter, you say? In the next few days, I’ll have a sign-up sheet over at my Facebook Author Page:https://www.facebook.com/laurengreenewrites. I’ll send a newsletter out once a month or so with important news about my books. I’ll also feature some authors I love who are up and coming, just like me. I’ll have a personal section, a section on writing, and probably a section on what I’m currently reading. This is still in the works! So make sure to be on the lookout for the sign-up sheet that’s coming soon!

The Writing Process

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Yesterday, I posted about the inspiration behind The Devil Within. So what happens after inspiration hits? I think the question I get the most as an author is: where do your ideas come from? And honestly, objects, things, sayings all inspire the ideas, but when I sit down to write it’s like magic. Here’s where the magic happens, in my writing space:

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I write in a La-Z-Boy recliner in the middle of our living room (excuse the mess on the floor). The chair I sit in was handed down from my Gipop after Gigi passed away. I remember when I was little and would go over to their house, my grandfather would sit in this chair and read all the time. I have an emotional attachment to this chair, because it reminds me of him.

The kids are often running around, talking to me, or watching TV while I write away. I like being in the center of it all instead of locked in a room away from everyone. When I start writing, I put on my pink headphones, hit shuffle on Pandora, and then my fingers start walking across the keyboard. I’m a pantser (write from the seat of my pants), but I do research and I make character sketches. Not so much a written sketch, as I put descriptions, personality quirks, etc. into an excel spreadsheet. This is specifically useful if you have a lot of characters or if halfway through the book you mention blonde hair on your protagonist when she really has brown.

Earlier I mentioned magic, and I do believe that’s what writing is. There’s no way to describe what it’s like when I’m in the zone. It’s a feeling of being only semi-present. The music falls into the background, and I don’t even really hear it. The words come out and sometimes I’m surprised by the similes and metaphors that appear on the page. Most writers I know have had this experience of being bodily present but their mind being in a higher realm. I’m not a religious person, but there is something spiritual about the writing process.

Stay tuned for more about the writing of The Devil Within. 

The Cross Garden

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I know I’ve told you all the inspiration for The Devil Within came from the Go to Church or the Devil Will You Get You sign. But growing up in the South I was surrounded by a lot of folklore and crazy roadside attractions.

One day when my sister was in college, she brought her then-boyfriend, now-husband down to visit. We told my parents we were going to go buy fro-yo, but instead Kelsey took us toward Prattville. She had heard about this man who lived out in the country who had covered is whole yard with crosses and signs. People flocked from all over to see these crosses.

We drove north from Montgomery for about thirty minutes until we found The Cross Garden. Not only did this man have crosses littering his yard, the hills across from his house, but he also had signs proclaiming things like Hell is Hot Hot Hot.

The story we had been told was that this man had a dream and Jesus came to him and told him to repent or something terrible would happen to his family. He laughed it off. A few weeks later, his wife and children were killed in a car wreck on the interstate. Amidst the handmade crosses in his yard was a wrecked car. Supposedly he had the wrecking company bring the car there so he could always be reminded of his mistake. He made his yard and surrounding land a tribute to Jesus and the hell that awaits sinners on judgement day.

I often thought about The Cross Garden and how horrible it would be to lose your family. It’s funny, because thanks to the power of Google I now know the car accident never really happened. The owner of the Cross Garden wanted people to see the power of God and to be saved before they burned for eternity in Hell. Don’t you just love the South?

Read more about the Cross Garden and the owner, the late W.C. Rice. 

Booktrope, who are they anyway?

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In my last blog, I told you I was publishing “The Devil Within” through Booktrope.  Now I’d like to tell you a little bit about Booktrope, why I chose them, and what my experience with them has been like.

In the beginning, I took the path of many other authors before me. I hemmed and hawed, and I didn’t want anyone to see my work.  If you’re an author you probably know about the anxiety of showing others your work. I have a fear of criticism (don’t most people?) and for a while I let it hold me back. Last year I had a revelation. I had been complaining for far too long that I wanted to be an author without actually doing anything an author does.  I set goals. I began to write, and then I set long term goals. My first long term goal was to self-publish a book in January 2015.  Okay—this is a fib—originally I wanted to self-publish in November 2014. We all know how I love procrastinating right? Plus November and December are crazy holiday months, and I had some important family/personal things crop up that took precedence over my writing.

I published No Turning Back in January 2015. I only published it in digital format on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Kobo. I intended (and still do) to go through Createspace to produce paper books, but then my life took a turn when Booktrope accepted The Devil Within.

Woo—this story is longer than one of my novels. Anyway.  A few months back, I became part of a group called the Writing Wenches. One of my wenches (and I mean that as sweetly as possible), encouraged me to submit to Booktrope since she is as a project/book manager for them.

I didn’t know if The Devil Within was ready. I had slowly been putting it out on Wattpad, but didn’t have a huge audience, because let’s face it, Southern Literature is not their biggest thing. I had great feedback from friends, and so I thought Heck, why not give it a shot. Honestly, I didn’t think I would ever publish The Devil Within because the story is tragic and can be hard to read. I wasn’t sure there was a market for it, and after my failure of marketing No Turning Back and then reading about how Booktrope provides a book market manager, I thought it was worth a shot.

So what makes Booktrope different? First of all, they’re considered a hybrid publisher.  They do not take every book submitted to them, but they do take a lot of books because they have open submissions. They’re less concerned with taking a book of literary genius than giving talented writers out there a chance to showcase their work.  You could say they’re quantity over quality, and maybe that’s how they make the majority of their money, but they do produce quality work, and they have talented writers.  Plus, they give an author a chance to have their book published when their queries aren’t turning agents’ heads, or when they’ve been rejected for the million-cajillionith time, or when they think they’ve written something good or great but they’re unsure of what agent to query because maybe it doesn’t fit in a nice, tidy genre box.  Booktrope is not a vanity press.  Booktrope gives authors the opportunity to pick a team, to work with that team to make their book as good as possible, and then each team member gets a cut of the royalties.  Nothing is spent upfront, unless you want to do some specialized marketing, i.e. a blog tour. That said, even though there’s a marketing manager, the author is still responsible for a shit ton of marketing. Shortly, I will be producing a newsletter, calling newspapers, and promoting my work. This is the same in almost every publisher of today.

Overall, I’ve been happy with my Booktrope experience. When I first signed on, I was a little lost in their system because it’s a learning curve. I do feel there should be some formal training for authors so they don’t have to figure it all out themselves. There are some documents on their homepage for authors, but it would be nice if Booktrope would set expectations for authors and book managers together, so they know what to expect from one another. I found all the people I worked with to be courteous and professional. I also had the opportunity to meet other authors and help promote their work, which I’m always glad to do for fellow fledglings.

Will I use Booktrope again? That has yet to be determined. I’ll see how this release goes. I’ll figure out if they address some kinks in the system that really need to be addressed, and I’ll make the decision at a later time.

Until then, stay tuned for more news on how The Devil Within came to be!

Go to Church or The Devil Will Get You

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A few years ago, I had an idea about this sign:

DSC_0086-2 (3)

Photography by Amanda Willis

In case you all aren’t familiar with this sign, it sits off the interstate between Montgomery, Alabama and Birmingham, Alabama.  And the story behind the sign is innocuous and not at all like what I wrote in “The Devil Within.”

When I first thought of this book idea, I didn’t want to write it. The suffering seemed intense in the story that swam in my head. Similar to Nabokov when he wrote Lolita, after I wrote “The Devil Within” I thought no one would want to read it.  The story is, well, tragic. Luckily, I have this amazing person in my life named Sheri Williams (she’s a writer too!). Sheri encouraged me to submit “The Devil Within” to Booktrope, and I decided to listen to her advice. Imagine that, me listening to someone else’s advice! What a roller coaster it has been since. The book was accepted and since then I’ve learned the following things:

  • Having your book edited is hard.
  • I’m a major procrastinator, and when something is hard for me to cope with I procrastinate more.
  • I’m whiny and like to complain a lot when I’m just scared of the next step.
  • I still have a bad habit of putting two spaces behind the period (And I still think it looks better, even though the purpose behind that was because of typewriters).
  • I have to have goals and schedules and someone waiting on me to get things done.
  • Sheri Williams is really good at being supportive and also really good at telling me to stop sitting on my butt!

Okay–I’ve learned way more than that too.  Anyway, over the next month or so before the book comes out (Think mid to end of June), I’ll be posting about the process of writing this book, a few teasers, about the South and Alabama, and eventually I’ll be doing a Rafflecopter giveaway for a free copy of the book too.

You can check it out right here or you can follow me on:

Facebook – Lauren Greene Writer

Twitter — @laurenegreene

Now for a cup of coffee and then time to get to work! Feel free to ask me any questions you have regarding the book, my process with Booktrope, or anything else you want in the comments!

Cold Heart, Cold Mind

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I wrote for Finish That Thought today.  I’ve been taking too many breaks lately, letting the urge to write slip away form me. This week, I’m trying to get back on the wagon (so to speak).  I have editing of my next book to do, and I keep putting it off.  I’m going to try to set some goals over the weekend, and I’ll post them here next week.  I’m goal oriented, and when I track I do so much better.  Plus, blogging! I haven’t been doing it after the A to Z Challenge nearly as much as I want to. I’m hoping with summer quickly descending on us and the absence of afternoon activities for the kids that I’ll be more productive.  We shall see!

Cold Heart, Cold Mind
@laurenegreene
495 words

I had not felt this way for a long time, but then again it had been a while since I’d been back. Dad had cut the topiaries into animal shapes, and covered with snow, they reminded me of the scene from “The Shining,” so I kept a safe distance, hugging the side of the hedge as I walked to the door. My heart pounded in my chest like a million drummers in a band. The snow fell around me, and I shivered as I stood there trying to build up my nerve. I felt like a little kid again, lost and alone, not to mention freezing—Florida was so nice this time of year, I wish I’d never left.

If I stood there one more second, I might turn into an icicle, or worse yet I might freeze in one position snow-covered like the topiaries dotting Dad’s yard. I knew he needed me. My comfort. My presence, but the truth was I didn’t care about him anymore. Ever since he’d left Mom, I’d told myself he didn’t matter.

But then Janie had called six months ago and said Grace had died. Dad had dementia. She would arrange a nurse. Even nurses needed vacations, and Janie was out of pocket this week, in Disney World with her husband and three kids. I guess she deserved a vacation too.

I rubbed my hands together, they seemed frozen solid, and I wasn’t sure if the fist would form so I could knock on the door. The topiaries were so well trimmed. Was that part of Hanna’s job description or had Dad kept up with them, even in his confusion? Finally, I knocked.

Hanna came to the door, wearing a white nurse’s cap, like someone out of an old-timey movie. From behind, Dad wrapped his arms around her and squeezed.

“She’s a hottie, isn’t she?” Dad asked, as Hanna pushed his arm from her waist.

“Bill, I’ve told you a thousand times, I’m your nurse not your wife.”

“Where’d Grace get off to?”

I stood in the doorway, my eyelashes nearly frozen. Winter in Michigan was hell.

“You must be Christina. Thank God you’re here.”

Dad scooted around Hanna and screwed up his eyeballs as his mind whirled like a hamster on a wheel, trying to locate me in a sea of frothy memories.

“Tell my friends to come in too, Grace. They’re covered in snow,” he said, waving to the topiaries.

“They’re better off outside, Dad,” I said as Hanna scooted out of the way, and I stepped into the warmth of the house.

“Dad?” he asked.

“It’s Christina, your youngest daughter,” I said.

“I don’t have any children. Just ask Grace,” Dad said.

“She’s dead, Dad,” I said.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you Christina. I’m leaving in ten minutes. Let me show you where your dad’s meds are,” Hanna said.

Dad stared at the topiaries. The only friends he had, left out in the cold.

Indecision

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Hello my lovely readers! I took a small break after the A-Z Challenge. Okay, I took off a whole week! I worked on my work-in-progress, which is slow going, but it’s finally going. And I finished up the editing for “The Devil Within,” then sent it off for proofread. Yay!  I also went to have my head shots done by my friend Amanda.  “The Devil Within” is coming together and will be out in a little bit more than a month.

Today, I wrote for Micro Bookends. And it’s funny, yesterday on a field trip with my son I was talking to one of the parents about my study abroad in Argentina (Buenos Aires to be exact). So this Micro Bookends was appropriate. I can’t believe it’s been 15 years since I went to Argentina! What a wonderful trip that was. I met some influential people, learned a language, and I really fell in love with Buenos Aires.  I still think about my friend’s host parent’s doberman named Otto.  I’m sure he’s long gone by now, but that dog was something else!

Here’s Micro Bookends today. The challenge was to use the words “First” and “Lady,” and the photo prompt was of a building in Buenos Aires with Eva Peron’s face painted on the facade.

Indecision
@laurenegreene
109 words

“First, we’re going to visit the Pink House.”

Chewing gum, sitting on the street corner, Dad plotted the trip as I looked up at the portrait of Evita painted on a building. Henry sat down next to me.

“No, maybe we’ll go to Recoleta first.”

“Evita Peron,” Henry said.

“I know that,” I said.

“Don’t cry for me Argentina, the truth is we’ll never see you. Because Dad’s indecisive. And a staller. We’ll be sitting on this corner, for the rest of our lives,” Henry said.

Dad put away the tour book and said, “Hey guys, don’t just sit there. Look at that. Eva Peron. She was some lady!”