Lifestyle Changes

September 28, 2015 / legreene515 / 5 Comments

This weekend, I had little time to myself. On Saturday, every kid had something going on. I spent most of my day driving around town. When you have three young kids, you really do feel like a Taxi cab sometimes. My mom made up for my long hellish day in the car by making Cosmos in the evening. What a great way to relax after running around all day.

But on Sunday I was looking for some time to myself. About four years ago, I decided to get into shape. I had spent a few years popping out babies and sitting on the couch. I loved television and not much else. I had no friends, besides people at work, and I ate Mexican food every day (or so it seemed). I started by taking Taekwondo. We did high intensity interval classes there that kicked my butt, but also helped me drop the pounds. I learned how to have fun and exercise at the same time. While I lost weight I also lost my hair, but I gained confidence in myself too, and I started finding out what it took to maintain a healthy lifestyle. And before I knew it I lost 60 pounds.

I don’t really have a lot of before photos of my whole body. But here’s one I found from 2011, and directly below it is one from just the other day. You can tell such a difference just from my face:

Making a lifestyle change is hard. I backslide often. I have days I don’t want to get off the couch. But more often than not, I feel bad if I don’t exercise. I push myself to exercise so I have energy and feel healthier and better about my body and myself. The better I feel, the better my writing is, the more I can give to my husband, my children, and my job.

On Sunday, I decided to go for a run. (I just took up jogging again, and I’ve been building up slowly). Usually I get super bored on runs, but because of my lack of me- time, I had a lot to think about. As I ran, I solved problems regarding my main character in the book I’m editing. I thought about each one of the kids. I figured out what I had to do this week, and I exercised. Exercise is a great way to give yourself some time to just be by yourself. We’re so overwhelmed in this world by electronics, other people, and busy schedules that we rarely have time to just be. Creative minds need time to reflect and meditate in order to create. And I’ve found running to be a great time to do that.

About once a week, I’m going to do a weight loss/exercise/healthy living post. I’ll tell you all ways I’ve found that have helped me to lose weight and keep it off. I’ll let you know how to climb onto the wagon when you fall off. I’ll let you know what’s worked well for me and what hasn’t. I hope you’ll enjoy these posts!

What are your goal regarding your lifestyle?

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Comfort Zone

September 23, 2015 / legreene515 / 2 Comments

Every day, instead of getting dressed and showered, I’d be content to sit around in my snowman pajama bottoms. I’ve written about these P.J.s before, over on my personal blog (which has sadly gone by the wayside). You know how some clothes just make you feel good? Well my snowman P.J.s make me feel comfy. They’re like walking around in a blanket all day long. It’s like having someone’s arms wrapped around you without all the extra weight. It’s like biting into your mom’s homemade casserole after you’ve been away at college for three months. I can’t say enough times that I LOVE my snowman P.J.s. They’re part of my tangible comfort zone.

Do you have a comfort zone? I have always been a person who has had firm routines, firm traditions, and, yes, even clothes that make me feel comfortable, happy, and most like myself. When I first started writing, my comfort zone included not letting anyone seem my work. If they did then GASP, they might not like it! They might ask me difficult questions about the meaning behind my work. They might draw conclusions I didn’t come up with. They might tell me that I’m a horrid writer and not to ever bother picking up a pen.

Good thing, most people don’t tell this to an inspiring writer (except maybe agents, but I haven’t gotten that far yet, and I’d hope they’d have more couth). They do, don’t they? As a writer, I’ve had to step out of my comfort zone more often than not.

One of the things that most scares me as a newbie writer is public speaking. I hate public speaking. In 9th grade, World Cultures I had to do a book review on The Black Death, which I hadn’t even read (sorry Mr. Roberts—I skimmed it). I had to stand in front of a whole group of fourteen years old, and I was an awkward fourteen year old myself who felt like everyone in the class was noticing my bald spots or seeing me naked—I couldn’t figure out which one was worse at that age. And I said “um” exactly 52 times. How do I know it was 52 times? Because Mr. Roberts told me when he asked me to stay after class. He said he’d give me one more chance the next day. He gave me some tips, and I pulled it off the next day pretending like I was having a personal conversation with my friend Allie the whole time.

Mr. Roberts didn’t eliminate my fear of public speaking, but he did give me ground rules for how to deal with a situation that made me uncomfortable. That’s the first step when we’re out of our comfort zone, right? Find something to make you comfortable–a point of relation with your audience, a realization that the person who is reading you work is a human like you–heck, they may even be a writer like you, and the ability to problem solve and find a way to calm your nerves in a new situation.

Stepping out of your comfort zone helps you grow as a person (and as a writer, if you are one). If I’d never let anyone see my writing, I’d still be unpublished. If I’d never done a fake book review on the bubonic plague then I’d be even more afraid of public speaking than I currently am.

Take off your snowman pajamas, try on something new, and see how much you can achieve!

What have you done to step out of your comfort zone?

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Weekend In Review

September 21, 2015September 21, 2015 / legreene515 / 4 Comments

This weekend, I went to see my niece. She went away to college about a month ago, and I took the boys to see her (plus her sister). We went to Airwalk, and my oldest who is a gymnast had fun flipping, as usual. He’s getting so good, and I can’t believe how far he’s come in the last few years with his gymnastics.

All week long, I’d been suffering from a cough and cold, but by the time we got back I felt so ill. I spent most of yesterday on the couch. I also did a Reddit Author Spotlight on The Devil Within.

Feel free to go read the Reddit posts. I had some great, thought-provoking questions, about the book.

What did you do this weekend?

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Reddit Author Spotlight on The Devil Within

September 14, 2015September 13, 2015 / legreene515 / Leave a comment

Talk about a busy weekend. I reserved a little section of Sunday afternoon to figure out how to do Reddit and to blog so I could post a Monday blog tomorrow. Well, you know, in life things never go as planned. I woke up this morning, went for an amazing run in 55 degrees weather (I love Fall), and came home to boot up the computer so I could watch an episode of How I Met Your Mother, before taking my kids to church. Guess what? WiFi didn’t work. Hubby investigated. The box shorted out, and I won’t have working WiFi until Tuesday. This is like an author’s biggest nightmare! I mean, how will I let the world know what I’m up to and that I have a Reddit Q&A on The Devil Within coming up this Sunday, September 20th?

I took a nap after the church picnic, and then I came to Starbucks so you lovelies would have a chance to read my Monday Blog. For some reason, Pandora won’t play and I’m stuck listening to people’s conversations and the elevator music in the background, but hey, at least I have WiFi!

So I hope you will all be able to make it to the author event on September 20th. I will answer any questions you may have about The Devil Within. For those of you who haven’t read it, you can find the book on Amazon I ebook for $2.99 and paperback for $11.95.

Here’s the blurb:

When nine-year old William loses most of his family in a car accident, he is left alone with a religious zealot of a father. As a result of his father’s abuse, William blames himself for his family’s death and becomes convinced the devil is leading him astray. The backdrop of life in a rural town in the 1960’s sets the tumultuous scene as William struggles to cope in a world no child should have to face on his own. Will William be saved, or will he succumb to the devil within?

I hope to see you all at the Reddit event at /r/ books at 1 PM on Sunday, September 20th! Make sure to come up with some great questions for me, and I’ll try my best to answer them.

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A Bedtime Fairy Story

September 12, 2015 / legreene515 / 3 Comments

Yesterday, I worked a little bit on my newest Southern Fiction piece. I wrote a story within a story, because the main character Anna Kate told her brother and sister a bedtime story. Last night, I told my daughter Anna Kate’s story and it made her cry (yeah, I may need to work on it).

At yoga, while doing Savasna, where I’m supposed to be focusing on my breath, the story came to me. At the beginning of yoga, I talked to my awesome yoga instructor and my co-workers about how writing is cathartic for me. Earlier in the day I was lamenting that I had no idea what to blog about, and my story seemed to be going nowhere. And then, right as my body sunk into deep relaxation, and my brain cleared this story came to me:

Here it is, in all it’s glory, totally unedited:

“Once upon a time there was a fairy princess name Lucy. And she lived in a big castle with her brother, Ben—”

“That’s my name,” Ben said, bouncing up and down on his knees.

“Shh—” Lucy snapped at him and Ben stuck his thumb in his mouth sucking vigorously as he blinked away the brewing tears.

“Lucy’s wings had been snipped, and more than anything she wanted to fly. She wished so hard she could fly, but every day she tried and she couldn’t. Her brother, Ben, flitted around the castle and every day Lucy grew more and more jealous of his ability to fly. She wished with all her might that she could fly like Ben, but when she woke up each and every morning to try, she failed.”

“I don’t like this story,” Lucy said with a pout.

“It’s getting to the good part,” I said. “Just listen. Where was I? Oh yes, one day Ben flew far away, and when Lucy went to find him she could not. She walked out of the garden gates, and down a twisting path, and deep into the woods. The woods were dark and eerie, but Lucy, being the brave girl she was, walked on in search for her brother.”

Lucy and Ben stared at me, all eyes in the darkness of the room. I swallowed and continued the story, kicking the sheets off of me in the muggy room.

“Finally, Lucy came upon a stone house…”

“Oh, I know—it’s like Hansel and Gretel. Mama used to tell us that story all the time,” Lucy said.

“Let me finish, Lucy. It’s not Hansel and Gretel. Okay—Lucy came upon the stone house, and she turned the doorknob, but it was locked. She knocked and a kindly young woman with hair the color of chocolate answered the door. ‘Yes, child, what do you want?’ ‘I’m looking for my brother, Ben,’ Lucy said. The woman invited her into the comfort of her home, and Lucy was relieved to see her fairy brother sitting in the corner eating a bowl of porridge.”

“With brown sugar,” Ben added.
“Yes, of course, with brown sugar and warm milk,” I continued, patting Lucy on the head. “The lady told Lucy she had put Ben under a spell, and he would stay there forever, but she had a choice and could possibly save him. She could have her greatest wish granted and be able to fly—her one and only wish–or she could have her brother back. She couldn’t have both. She had to choose one. And what do you think she chose?”

Lucy yawned and looked at me. “She chose her brother, of course, but if I had really been there, I would have chosen the wings. Who needs a stinky brother anyway?”

It still needs work, but I like the concept. And when I told it to Hailey at bedtime last night, she was absorbed with the story. I added details, changed the main character to her and both her brothers played a roll too. And when I came to the end I told her she could have wings to fly or she could have her brothers back, but she could only choose one. And she started crying and said she wanted the wings but didn’t want her brothers to disappear forever! Poor thing. I comforted her and told her the point of the story, then she hugged me hard and went to bed.

I think there’s an important lesson in the story for all of us. Family and friends are so important, and they can often be overlooked for our wishes/wants. We get so caught up in the corporate grind, the business of life, in wanting things, and in wishing for our greatest dreams to come true that we often forget the most important thing in our life is the people we love.

What are you writing right now?

Next Sunday, on September 20, 2015, I will be doing a Question and Answer session on The Devil Within over on Reddit! Make sure you stop by to ask me a question!

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Expect Less, Live More

September 9, 2015 / legreene515 / 8 Comments

When I went to Midwest Writer’s way back in July (it now feels like eons ago), someone said to make a name for yourself you have to blog. She/he (all the faces blurred together-sorry for vagueness) said readers like to hear from authors consistently, so set up a blog schedule and stick to it. Well, obviously I’ve fallen short in that category. I intend to blog three times each week, but sometimes things happen (like lice, or vacation, sick kids, sick me, anxiety-ridden can only sit on the couch and watch seventeen episodes in a row of How I Met Your Mother type days). But it got me thinking about expectations.

A few years back, I felt unhappy. And during that time, I found my love for writing again. I started writing for catharsis, to heal old wounds, and new. I wrote to rid myself of feelings I deemed wrong or inappropriate. I wrote to find solace from within myself. I wrote so I could function every day and not curl up into a ball and rock back and forth in a corner even though some days I wanted to. Back then, I held myself and everyone around me up to sky-high expectations. And it was a nightmare.

Unrealistic expectations of others only serves to further unhappiness in yourself. When one has expectations of other people that those people don’t meet, then one is stuck in a state of disappointment. How can you be happy when you’re constantly disappointed with others? Expectations become a little like mind-reading. Come on, we all say we’re not mind-readers, but the truth is many of us expect others to read our minds. Many of us expect others to fill the void within us. Many of us expect to achieve happiness from other people, instead of searching for it where it really exists: inside ourselves.

When I really thought about this—letting go of expectations—I thought it was ridiculous. I mean come on. My whole life, I’d been trying to live up to my parents’ expectations, to my bosses’ expectations, to my teachers’ expectations, and to my own unrealistic expectations of achieving perfection. I wanted my marriage and life to seem perfect, and in the end I had set unrealistic expectations for myself. When I realized this, I sank further into the dark pit of oblivion called depression. And I had to pull myself out, one layer at a time. I had to realize by letting go of expectations that I had what it took to make myself happy and to spread that joy around.

You see, having expectations for yourself is okay, as long as you don’t set the bar too high. I have goals and expectations for myself on a daily basis, but I’m not afraid of failure anymore. I know failure is an opportunity to learn.

It took me a while to learn that pegging your expectations on others, well, that doesn’t work. It destroys relationships. It destroys friendships. It destroys happiness. Now when I reach out to a friend, I do it because I want to. Sure, in a perfect world, it’d be nice for my friends to always reciprocate. But I know when they don’t, it’s because they got busy. I’m not catastrophizing about all the reasons they don’t like me. I’m done obsessing about where they disappeared to when they didn’t call. Because all these things—they’re crazy-making, not happy-making! If you really want to know whether someone is your friend or not, then be there for them, and see if they give back from the deepness of their hearts. Talk to them. Put the phone down and meet them for lunch. Tell them how you feel. Stop guessing and expecting other people to read your mind!

The only person in this life who can make you happy is you. Let go of your expectations for others. Give because you want to give, not because you want someone to give back. I promise, if you do this you’ll see the world differently and it might even make you happy. Hold yourself accountable for your own happiness.

Have you found happiness? Have you found ways to let go of your expectations? If you’re a writer, do you write for happiness?

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Don’t Be A Chicken

September 3, 2015 / legreene515 / Leave a comment

I’ve been remiss in posting the last few days! Work and life have been crazy, and my kindergartener, sweet darling that she is, is having a terrible time adjusting to school. So my mind has been elsewhere.

Today, just so you know I still exist, I’m posting a piece I wrote for Finish That Thought. I made some minor tweaks, as I had a few typos originally. This piece won me the contest this week, so next week I’ll be judging! Any of you writers should make sure to enter.

Don’t Be A Chicken

Oh no, please no, I thought as I ran toward the Kentucky Fried Chicken. Or I should really say ran toward the train wreck that was once my diet. It was the smell of fried chicken. I’d whiffed the scent on my way home from the gym. All those hours, sweating in the gym to look good for Marco, and now I was about to stuff my face with a big-fat grease-filled chicken bucket. At least I could say the potatoes were a vegetable. Wait, were they?

Sweat poured down my face as I neared the KFC. I slowed to a light jog. At least I could justify it by saying I’d ran all the way here. How the scent of KFC could travel three whole miles down 83rd Street and alight on my nose the moment I walked out of the YMCA was beyond me. And I’d made the three miles in record time too: 25 minutes. Heck I’d be ready for a marathon soon—right after I dug into a huge bucket of chicken.

I opened the door and the wonderful scent of fried food wafted toward me. I inhaled deeply. This had to be heaven. After all the salad and fruit I’d been eating, I couldn’t wait to sink my teeth into a nice moist chicken leg. I didn’t even care if the scale reflected it in the morning. To heck with Suzie and her weekly weigh-ins.

Bucket in hand, smile on my face, I turned scanning the restaurant for the perfect place to devour 3,000 heavenly calories of perfect bird. And then—there he sat. By the window with the big swirly K. Marco. I couldn’t care less about being near him still wearing my soaking wet pink workout shirt. It wasn’t the sweat dripping off my face and forming puddles on the floor. No—here I stood in KFC holding a chicken bucket for one, and already gnawing on a chicken leg before I’d even found a seat.

He waved at me frantically, and I did what came naturally, pretended he didn’t exist. Maybe I could fit into the trash barrel. Maybe I’d drop the chicken bucket on the floor and run back into the heat, but then the sweet aroma tickled my nostrils again and I knew I needed another bite.

Wait a minute, Marco was committing the sin of fast fried food too! I smiled and waved like I was a desperate preteen girl who’d just gotten her braces removed. Oh, those kissable lips. And then, wait, what? He motioned for me to come sit with him. And before I could stop myself, I’d joined him. Giant bucket and all.

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The Life and Times of a Writer

August 27, 2015August 27, 2015 / legreene515 / Leave a comment

It’s been a rather crazy week in the world of the Greenes. Once school starts, everything seems to take off with super hero speed. But I’ve actually been productive this week too besides scrambling just to get everything done.

Here’s what’s been taking up my time and dragging me away from my readers at my lovely blog:

1.Editing my newest piece of Southern Fiction (Southern thriller, maybe?) Little Birdhouses. I finished Chapter 5 yesterday. Slow going, but I’m finally on a schedule.

2. Trying to figure out how to eat a Dairy Queen ice cream, take a “groupie” of me and the boys, and not include my hand in the photo (I still need work on this).

3. Putting together a newsletter for you lovely people to read. You can sign up at http://eepurl.com/bo4ILP. (Also, FYI the little monkey round button at the bottom of each of my posts is a newsletter sign-up). Next one goes out 8/31/15

4. Hanging at the playground with some fun peeps:

5. Writing loads of flash fiction at Finish That Thought, Micro Bookends, and Flash!Friday. Never winning, although I do have a knack for taking the special challenge winner. My day will come, I tell you!

6. Dealing with a sick Kindergartner and driving three kids to three different activities plus a day job, coordinating babysitters, and trying to figure out who is going to cook dinner.

7. Writing a Southern Literature novel with no name. How I wish I could find a name for the dang thing, but at least the words are flowing.

8. Trying to figure out Reddit so I can entertain my readers on September 20th:

9. Exercising to burn a few calories (more news soon about a collaborative Healthy Writer piece!)

10. Drinking lots of wine so I can consume the calories I just burned off.

That’s my life in a nutshell right now. Crazy busy. I’m thinking organization, calendars, and scheduling might be of use to me. These have never been my strong points, but I’m making a change (or trying to). I’m also trying to be more productive, because there is literally no time to procrastinate!

How you doing? What’s been going on in your world lately?

Did you know I wrote a book, and you have a chance to win a free copy but HURRY, because the winners will be picked on 8/31/15.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The Devil Within

by Lauren Greene

Giveaway ends August 31, 2015.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway

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Working Toward Better

August 24, 2015August 24, 2015 / legreene515 / 8 Comments

I meant to blog yesterday, but instead I worked on my Woodley Road story. I wrote 1,000 words, and I feel like it helped to drag me out of my funk. The story is Southern Fiction set in the 1920’s and takes a ton of research, but wow, I’ve found out loads of information about cotton farming and life in rural Alabama in 1920s. Research can be fun. I like becoming a mini-expert on these topics. My goal over the next few weeks is to get out to Ramer to see the area I’m writing about. I’ve been there before, but it’s be awhile. I’d like to walk in Anna Kate’s shoes and feel the soil underneath her feet.

I sat down to write this blog several times over the weekend, and it unintentionally became a Monday Blog. Hubby and I were busy going on dates galore. Then we had people over yesterday. We were social butterflies, and it’s fun but I’m exhausted.

Plus, my five year old daughter is still out of sorts. She’s adjusting to starting her new school. I’m adjusting to her temper tantrums. I’m bad at dealing with tantrums. I need to bring my yoga into it, practice my breathing and just let her go through the ebbs and flows of her feelings. I’m good at writing emotions, but not great at dealing with them in real life. I need to practice, just like my writing, to make sure she knows anger is a feeling and it’s okay to feel it. Unfortunately, both hubby and I were (maybe still are) tantrum-throwers, so our natural inclination is to yell. And that’s the wrong thing to do.

As I lay in bed last night, I thought about how I’m ruining my child’s life forever, by not responding to her tantrums in an adult-like manner. I had that big overwhelming emotion of, “Oh God, because I lost it while she lost it she’s going to be depressed and emo and a mess as an adult.” I’d like to give her the tools now to deal with her emotions so maybe it won’t take her as long as it took me to get it. I want her to be able to feel her emotions, recognize them, work through them, and then let them go instead of bottling them up.

As I deal with these things with my daughter, I’m reminded of the influences they may have on my work. I should be able to write a Mommy Meltdown pretty dang good by now. And if Everett (Anna Kate’s little brother) throws a temper tantrum, I’ll be able to write it realistically too. It’s hard being a parent.

What have you been up to lately in life and/or writing? What are you trying to cope with/get better at dealing with?

Don’t miss out! There’s still time to win a free copy of The Devil Within. Click below to enter to win!

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The Devil Within

by Lauren Greene

Giveaway ends August 31, 2015.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway

https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/widget/147843

Lauren Greene, Author

Writing

#amwriting

Lifestyle Changes

Comfort Zone

Weekend In Review

Reddit Author Spotlight on The Devil Within

A Bedtime Fairy Story

Expect Less, Live More

Don’t Be A Chicken

Top Ten Books To Read

Now that you know my favorites, what are yours?

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The Devil Within

by Lauren Greene

Follow Lauren Greene:

The Life and Times of a Writer

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The Devil Within

by Lauren Greene

Working Toward Better

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The Devil Within

by Lauren Greene

Follow Lauren Greene: